Work Romance … Or A Lack Thereof

            I work in a deli inside of a large grocery store and I work with several people near my age. To me, it seems completely logical to have a crush on half of the guys I work with. And of course, knowing me and my taste in guys, I have a crush on the janitor. Yep. And he’s two years younger than me. For some reason most girls I know would have no problem with dating a guy at least five years their senior but would never go for a younger guy. Apparently I’m attracted to anyone between the ages of 17 and 24, which makes me feel a little pervy since I’m 21.

            Lately at work I’ve been in the middle of a little bit of drama, and I’m not used to it at all. Honestly, part of the reason why I have a crush on half the store is because I’ve never even been on a date and I’m starting to feel a little desperate. So my standards are not at their highest.

My story begins about a week ago. I work with a kid named Connor who I think is hilarious and fun, but amazingly I have absolutely no feelings for. He was joking around with the janitor – we’ll call him Martin (his real name is funnier though) – while we were both closing the deli. Here’s how it went down:

Connor: “I need to find you love Martin! … <completely joking> Alice, do you want to go on a date with Martin?” Martin had just walked away and I turned bright red. “Wait, you don’t really like him, do you?!!” So, that’s how Connor found out I had a little bit of a crush on Martin. Apparently after I went home that night he told Martin, but he didn’t believe Connor.

The next few days were a muddle of does-she-like-me-or-not. I denied it entirely. But last night I walked into the deli where Martin was collecting the trash and the first thing he said to me was “I know you like me, and it’s ok, I won’t treat you any differently.”

My response was to shove my hat as far over my eyes as possible and shout “I’m gonna go clean the meat slicer!” before turning and walking away. I never said I was mature.

It’s not all bad news though, because later Connor told me that when we were in the break room the night before with three other guys they all started talking about me after I left. Apparently I have a nice butt.


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