I’m 23 and I feel like I’m learning more about myself all the time. I’m so far from “having it all figured out”, and I will NEVER have it all figured out. But I did figure something out this month!
For a long time I’ve known that I have a bit of an obsessive personality. Everything from the way I crushed hard-core on the same guy for EIGHT years to the way I clean the counters at work has taught me this about myself. I prefer binge watching shows and can’t even see a point in eating just one scoop of ice cream. My father is a heavy drinker, so I’ve avoided drugs completely and have been very careful with alcohol because I just know that within myself there is that potential to become addicted.
For even longer I’ve known that I have some serious procrastination issues. I have always put homework off till the last minute. In college when we had midnight deadline, I literally submitted mine at 11:59pm. Every. Single. Time.
These two personality traits have led to many problems, one being the state of my room. My college roommate and best friend would call me a beginner hoarder. And I really couldn’t argue. My bedroom is huge, and completely filled with clutter: old school work, excess beauty products, clothes that date back to middle school, shoes that don’t even fit, and knickknacks galore.
I’ve been putting off cleaning it for pretty much my entire life. I would make it look acceptable, of course. But the closet was stuffed to the brim and I would hide stuff under my bed so it wouldn’t look so bad.
I have finally figured out how to get this impossibly daunting task done: I became obsessive about cleaning my room.
Almost every day for the past two weeks I have spent several hours in my room, sorting through boxes and ACTUALLY THROWING STUFF AWAY! I’ve thrown away six large bags and have donated two more two charity. I still have a lot of work to do and I should probably get rid of ten more bags of useless stuff. But I’m finally starting to see progress! It is a good feeling going to bed at night and looking around my room at the progress I have made.
I know that it’s not good to obsess over anything, but right now obsession is what I need. If I had just tried to clean my room a little bit at a time I would have never made any real progress. I need that driving force. I wake up in the morning thinking about those boxes. I start sorting through them in my pajamas before I’ve even brushed my teeth.
I’ve only got one more week to be obsessive, so it can’t do too much harm. I’m leaving to grad school next week! And I will be so relieved to know that when I graduate and get a great job (finger’s crossed) and move into my own place I won’t have to deal with packing up all of the crap I’ve collected over the last twenty-odd years. I’m not putting it off any longer!